n late August; when the air still reeks of summer scorch throughout the afternoon, but graciously gives us a slight… very slight bit of relief each morning and evening; our world’s most prized, yet unexplained phenomenon takes place. It is when the Earth glows orange from a sun that is in transition; its own sort of self-preparation for autumn that it sits at direct eye level quite early each day. When the fog has given up hope, yet lingers…only feet….or even inches from the ground; the ground which has been left cool by the night’s cold shoulder, and is just now beginning to feel the life of the morning heat reflecting off its skin. When the dew is still dripping like sweat from the neighborhood’s chin, leaving its extremities damp….does this magnificent occurrence…… occur…..
Our garden has once again blessed us with a splendid and abundant supply of fruits and vegetables; as we all know the peppers and tomatoes from mother’s said garden tastes far superior to anything found at the local market, yet it hasn’t been enough; we have all been waiting. We have been patiently waiting….
Much like the fresh homegrown fruits and vegetables; this treat which grows as the leaves on the largest, most peculiar branches of the community’s oldest, most enormous, yet faithful tree; tastes best directly from its root - incomparable to anything “store bought.” In fact, incomparable to anything you’ve ever laid upon your virgin tongue…..
On a particular morning, one would delightfully wake to the wonderful amber glow beaming slightly through a half cracked window of a tiny, one room shack of an apartment which sits very un-lady-like above an old bike shop. You hear the birds singing their praises and shouting obscenities to each other as you wonder, “Is this the morning?!” You go through this each and every morning at this time of year, and each morning the disappointment has left you alone again. Well…alone, with only the company of your burdens. But today you catch a wave of sound in the distance, and hear the giggles of young children waiting outside for the school bus; the giggles are different today, and you just know…..you can feel it in your bones, “Today is indeed the day!”
The sight outside is magical; it’s from a fairytale. It paralyzes you for what seems like hours. Someone from any other part of the universe would call it a fib if you tried to explain it. You squint slightly; the sun is bright in that direction. Its rays explode directly into your eyes…it’s at that perfectly unfortunate height, but it just exponentiates your excitement. You feel tears fall. Is it the sting of the sun or is it the joy of the moment? Your eyes adjust and you see it…. Astounding; like laying your eyes upon the one you love for the first time. Your breath is gone yet your heart races. You want to move close but you just stay; interaction may ruin this. There is no joy like this, and only a place like this could foster such an amazing string of emotion. Have you felt this before? If you have, the intensity of this moment has caused you to forget…..each and every time.
Did I mention this sight is magical? At first glance you see shadows of joyfully-orange creatures; illuminated by the morning’s glow through the slight sunk fog….living only for this moment without a care in the world. The importance of this moment in each and every soul present’s life is immeasurable. Old retirees and their wives jumping about with a colorful sea of buckets like as if they were young again; men in business suites, prancing around exposing their inner child, stretching out….coffee mugs held high for today’s meetings are no longer quite so important; mothers and daughters, nightgowns flowing in the morning breeze, holding a circus of tupperware; and children in their brand new school clothes, weighed down by the bulk of the packs strapped to their backs….heads tilted up and their mouths open wide, giggling with pure, genuine delight between each taste. You wonder, “Could something so incredible, so absolutely lovely be real?” It’s a moment in your life that you know you can never top. It’s such a great moment…so great that your mind is unable to think about the disappointment to come when it has passed. You’re just grateful for it always, because you know it’s something that will be with you even when it’s gone…even when you’re gone…even when you once didn’t believe that a feeling of your own could continue to exist while your body’s at rest….you now believe……..
Without notice, you find yourself in the company of the scene you once admired. You are now only a few yards from the trunk of the tree; with your headed tilted back, your mouth open wide; and finally…..the first warm, smooth, incredible taste from this miraculous peanut butter tree drips down your throat. It is the taste that will have to hold you over until next year, or even until the next life; the taste that makes the decision for you…. you want to LIVE! Alone, suffering, or hurt - it doesn’t matter because the fight is now in you…it’s with you. You want to live for a chance (as slight as it may be) to taste that feeling once again…..
As you’re down there; enjoying the rain of joy falling from the neighborhood peanut butter tree; I hear your screams of pure satisfaction from my quarters, and they wake me. “Is this the day?” I run down towards the tree, the sun’s rays explode in my eyes much like they had for you. When my eyes adjust I notice that they are momentarily locked with yours. I am paralyzed for what seems like hours, and I am oblivious to the commotion around me. For these moments that our eyes are locked; I feel what you felt only minutes before. My breath is gone yet my heart is racing, and I want to move close but I just stay; interaction may ruin this. There can be no joy like this; only this place could foster such an amazing string of emotion. This is the moment I laid my eyes upon the one I love for the very first time……the moment I saw you……the moment that I was expecting something else extraordinary, but you stood in the way….but you weren’t in the way….you were the way….everything had been realigned in that moment….the moment that made the decision for me – that I want to live for the chance (as slight as it may be) to look into those eyes once again…and feel everything good that this universe has to offer…and so I live. That is what the idea of the peanut butter tree is all about….its the best I can do to explain it, but you can’t truly explain a feeling….now can you?!
Wednesday, April 29, 2009
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Thursday, April 2, 2009
Wednesday, April 1, 2009
Another Reason to go to the U.K.
...guess who's rumored to be playing in that "special guests" spot...
Sunday, March 29, 2009
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